Speaking for Itself

Although the pandemic has me missing live theater, and grateful at some efforts to bring that experience into our homes, filmed productions are ultimately only a substitute for the real thing. And some live theater loses quite a bit in the translation. One example, in my view, is currently streaming on Hulu: Derek DelGaudio's In and of Itself.

This is one of those quasi-mysterious things where many people insist that the less you know about it before you watch it, the better. While I'm not sure I agree, it is true that it defies easy explanation; the whole here is undoubtedly greater than the sum of its parts. But since the alternative for me would be to creep along in a riddle-like review, here's my summary: In and Of Itself is part magic act, part one-man show (and moves throughout to different points on a continuum between those two things). Derek DelGaudio regales a captive audience with a series of stories, punctuated with clever illusions and sleight of hand, built around a central thesis of defining the self.

Some of the show works marvelously in the film format. Close-up magic is nearly always effective when a camera can get right in there and present things more clearly than you could see sitting in the back row of even a modest-sized off-Broadway theater. Elements of the show that differed from one night to the next in the live performance are sometimes shown in rapid-fire montage, underscoring how live theater isn't fixed in the way that movies and TV series are.

There's alchemy in what DelGaudio created with this show. He manages to be very serious without slipping into the off-putting pretentiousness that most self-serious magicians seem to have. He manages to tell deeply personal stories without the ridiculous navel-gazing commonly associated with "the one-man show."

But at the same time, it truly seems to me that "you had to be there." Throughout the film version (and particularly at the climax), we see audience members weeping openly at the experience they're having. The reaction seems utterly genuine and powerful... but also very personal. Perhaps I was in too hard-hearted a mood when I watched it, but for me it never really crossed the line from "well-crafted performance" into the sort of "life-changing revelation" that the live audience seemed to be having. I found it more thought-provoking than emotion-provoking.

Make no mistake: if you are a fan of magic, you will enjoy In and of Itself -- regardless of whether you would have liked it more in person. I'd grade it a solid B. But I may always wonder what it would have been like to see the show live, without knowing too much about it.