Titans became the leading light of the DC Universe TV push when its ComicCon trailer debut became famous for Robin saying "Fuck Batman." Look, everyone! So gritty! Even darker than the Zack Snyder movies!
Why am I watching Titans? Well, I have a soft spot for the characters, coming from an admittedly incompatible place. I watch the cartoon Teen Titans Go, and without turning this into a review of that show, I'll simply say: it's a lot of fun. My appreciation for the jokes (both corny and clever) grew over time to where I actually cared about many of the characters (except Robin; he's the worst), and even had favorites (Starfire and Raven are always trading positions on top of the podium). Surely some kernel of truth about the characters as I knew them from Teen Titans Go would be present in Titans.
Well, spoilers here, but: not exactly. Starfire spends most of the first season with amnesia. Raven doesn't know her own back story yet. Beast Boy is constrained by a CGI budget, so he only knows how to turn into one thing. And Cyborg? Not even here. (What the hell?!) I guess Robin isn't the worst anymore, but that's only because nothing I love about any of the other characters is actually here.
Despite the massive shortcomings, season one of Titans still managed to stay on the right side of watchable, and emerge as maybe a grade B endeavor overall. Most of that had to do with a pretty solid cast. (Again, though for completely different reasons, Raven and Starfire are the standouts.) But I did make it through the season at a pretty brisk pace, perhaps a little disappointed that Titans wasn't better, but not ever really having expected it would be.
Then came the train wreck of season two, a series of disastrous writing decisions I didn't think was even possible in a modern television writers' room. Every other episode is a flashback that interrupts the flow of the narrative to "provide information" you already easily intuited from context clues. The characters I was there for all become marginalized save Robin, pushed outside of the plot in favor of magnifying secondary season one characters and introducing entirely new ones. And the plot just makes no damn sense, revolving around everyone being mad at Robin (including Robin himself) for no realistic reason at all.
In season two, the dialogue is atrocious, the plot ridiculous, and the action dull. I felt "pot committed" for having made it some 18 episodes into 24 total episodes of the show, and just had to see it through -- even though it only got worse, not better. It felt like a grade D overall... and probably wasn't actually that good were it not for some residual good feelings carried over from season one. (Maybe. I mean, I did like it better than Aquaman, so there's that...) Season two of Titans is without question the worst season of television I've watched in its entirety in at least a decade.
Season three of Titans will be coming to HBO Max in a matter of weeks. Will they realize how horribly they stepped in it and course correct? Will I even care if they do? All I can say for sure is: if you haven't started Titans, just don't. If you have started? Maybe finish season one, watch enough of the first episode of season two to resolve the cliffhanger, and then cut your losses.
Between Harley Quinn and Teen Titans Go, it's sure looking to me like DC is only good when it's animated and willing to poke fun at itself.
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