Sunday, March 07, 2010

And the Oscar Snark Goes To...

Neil Patrick Harris strides out in the best jacket EVER.

Steve Martin is too cool to hide his harness under his coat.

Everyone nods “hey, that’s true” when Steve Martin mentions being borne a “poor black child” in his first movie.

Everyone nods even more knowingly when they say Woody Harrelson is so high… “hey, that’s true.”

What’s with Dumbledore sitting behind Quentin Tarantino?

Even with their “category intro” piece, the Up people show why they deserve the Oscar.

Robert Downey Jr. has takent he time to match his big-ass bow tie to his goofy sunglasses.

It says a lot about John Hughes that he gets his own segment, separate from the conventional “death montage,” in a year when so many celebrities passed away.

I have to say, Logorama looks pretty sweet. And the French man’s acceptance speech is the best of the night to that point.

The Music by Prudence guy looks like he's getting Kanye Wested by this crazy lady in purple.

Clearly, no one thought Star Trek would win the Makeup Oscar, since they sat the winners way the hell in back. I think they played the entire musical score of the film before they reached the stage.

Steve Martin: "I wrote that speech for him." Oh, snap!

Why is Robin Williams presenting in front of lamp shades?

Mo'nique thanks the Academy for not letting "politics" affect her category... and in the next breath, thanks Oprah Winfrey for telling everyone to go see the movie.

Now the lamp shades have been replaced with bookcases?

"This Oscar sees you. Your vision is so deep." Unlike this speech.

Is Sarah Jessica Parker's dress Doric, Corinthian, or Ionic?

The woman who won for Best Costumes dressed very ironically for the occasion.

Charlize Theron is dressed as "Stare-At-My-Boobs Barbie."

Kristen Stewart, as always, looks pissed off to be wherever she is.

The Sound Design winner for The Hurt Locker looks like he should be conducting an orchestra somewhere. "It's such a great honor to be hair."

Let me get this straight. The show is running behind, so you decide that the thing you should cut is the clips from the films nominated for Best CINEMATOGRAPHY?

From a distance, it looks like Jennifer Lopez is wearing bubble wrap.

And is Sam Worthington actually chewing GUM on stage at the Oscars? What a tool.

Hip-hop, breakdancing, and capaweta to the music from Fantastic Mr. Fox just looks weird.

Almost as weird as doing The Robot to the music from Up.

The Milk of Sorrow could have won Best Foreign Film on title alone. That just sounds like the most depressing movie ever.

Jeff Bridges has waited decades for this Oscar. His speech may run decades more.

Steisand needs some boy to help her down three stairs.

Kathryn Bigelow wins a much-deserved best Director award. She deserves another award for having been married to James Cameron.

James Cameron will have to console himself with a treasure bath in his ridiculous profits from Avatar; the Best Picture goes to The Hurt Locker.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

The Dude! Bridges was obviously winging that speech but it was great you could tell he wasn't expecting it and was very appreciative.

I thought the foreign language film winner had a very clever joke when he said he was lucky that they didn't consider Na'vi to be a foreign language.

watching the show last night reminded me of why I'm much better off just reading the list of winners the next morning...

the mole

Anonymous said...

Yeah, I have to agree with the Mole: the show was pretty boring this year. I mean, it's never a party-train, but I think Baldwin and Martin were very tame and hardly present at all! I miss the days when someone like Billy Crystal would really grab that show by the balls and run with it.
Shows my age, I suppose.

FKL

Anonymous said...

One more thing: Jeff Bridges ages VERY well. Man does he look good.
So does Sandra Bullock, of course... except that when you still look like you're 20 when you've reached 45, the jig is up.

FKL