Isn't It At Least a Month Early?

Tonight, I went to see the new Rob Zombie remake of Halloween. I've had a soft spot for the original that's faded over time. This gradual fading had gotten me to the point where I was kind of interested to see this new verison. But then the advance word and commericals started in, and I found that the more I was seeing about this remake, the less interested I was becoming.

But the bottom line was this -- I've been house-bound for over two days, and I was itching to get out for a few hours. I had friends interested in going, and not enough energy for anything more demanding than sitting in a darkened theater, so there you go.

This new Halloween isn't terrible. But it's not particularly great, either. Frankly, it kind of looks like Rob Zombie couldn't quite make his mind up on how to approach this film either. The first half of the movie is a near-complete invention/re-invention -- Michael Myers' "origin story," if you will. It's pretty over-the-top, loaded with swearing and violence, and doesn't really feel much connected with the original Halloween.

This isn't necessarily a bad thing. Or a good thing. It's hard to say. On the one hand, I want to commend the movie for carving out new territory, but on the other, it doesn't feel quite in the spirit of Michael Myers to "humanize" his backstory in this way.

And as I said, it feels like maybe Rob Zombie isn't quite sure if this is the right choice either, because the second half of the movie then becomes very concious of the original, and proceeds to duplicate most of its major scenes and most famous camera shots. At which point, I start to think that maybe this remake IS being true to the original after all, but then I strangely start to wonder "well, what's the point then?"

I know this is all a double-standard, and that there may well have been no approach this movie could have taken that I would have found wholy satisfying. I guess this is the bargain you make when you remake a classic, though.

As a horror movie, it was pretty tame. Most of the suspense of the original was jettisoned to get to quick action in this remake. A valid choice for our day and age, I suppose, but to me it means that all the big scares here were just of the "make you jump" variety -- which I tend to find unsatisfying.

I give the movie a C-.

And as for the teeth.... doing pretty well now. I graduated from eating total mush like Jell-O and oatmeal to eating near-mush like scrambled eggs and Spaghettios. I still have to eat so slowly that I get full and/or bored with what I'm eating before I can finish it. It is funny, though, the first time I bite into something new I've just "upgraded" to -- it's like the best I've ever tasted when I pop that first nibble into my mouth. So that's a plus, I guess.