US Tour

Day two of my Orlando vacation! We spent the first few hours returning to Islands of Adventure (for a second dose of Harry, and some of the rides I mentioned yesterday). Then we moved over to the second Universal Studios park in Florida, appropriately titled -- get this -- Universal Studios Florida. Here's the rundown of the fun there:

Shrek 4-D. This was our first ride of the park, and almost punished us for forgetting our "no test seat out front equals boring" policy. You stand around and watch a video as a performer cracks lame jokes for five minutes. Good for getting out of the heat, but not for much else. But then you're ushered into a theater for a big screen, 10 minute mini-movie. Unlike most films released these days, the 3-D effects didn't suck. And there were lots of good gags with seats that jounced you and sprayed you with air or water. We waited maybe 10 minutes to get in, which I'd say is about the appropriate threshold for this ride.

(An aside: I learned later on this trip that "jounce" is actually a word. As far as I can tell, it means exactly the same thing as "bounce," right down to being both a noun and a verb, but is worth more points in Words With Friends.)

Hollywood Rip Ride Rockit. This is a neat roller coaster that begins by taking you straight up a 90 degree incline and dropping you down the other side. Loaded with hills, inversions, and twists, it's a challenging ride even for a roller coaster enthusiast. I confess that I got a bit light-headed during the ride; I thought to myself at one point, "if this keeps going at this intensity, there is a chance I'm actually going to black out here." (It didn't, nor did I.)

So that's all the cool part. Then there's the strange part, the "plot" of the ride, if you will. You are helping two animated "cool characters" make a music video. You select one of 30 songs at the start of the ride, and that song will play in speakers right by your head for the entire duration. Then there are video cameras for each pair of riders that record your entire ride (which you can purchase at the end for an astronomically laughable price). I chose Daft Punk's "Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger" so that now when I hear the song, an image might spring to mind other than people writing on their hands/bodies with Sharpees.

Twister... Ride It Out. No test seat out front. We went anyway because there was no wait. And it was looking like it wasn't going to be worth it even for no wait. The first half of the roughly 10 minute experience is basically a glorified museum exhibit about the making of the film, the most novel feature of which is seeing videos of 15-years-younger Bill Paxton and Helen Hunt talking to you, the amusement park goer.

Then comes the final room, where the effects of a tornado play out on a stage-like area in front of you. Actually, this wasn't very special either. Except that for some reason, most of the people there really seemed to think it was. Every spray of water, blast of wind, flash of lights, and shake of scenery had pockets of people screaming like their lives were actually in jeopardy. Which kind of made the whole experience worthwhile. I wouldn't bet on getting lucky with a paranoid bunch of screamers in your group, though; this is probably one attraction you should skip.

Revenge of the Mummy. This is an indoor roller coaster based on the film The Mummy. I remember thinking at the time that it wasn't half bad. And yet the fact that I can recall no real details of it now, not even a week later, suggests to me that it's obviously not as good as most of the rides I enjoyed on the trip.

Men in Black Alien Attack. I don't remember a lot about this ride either, but for a very different reason. This is an indoor coaster-like ride; coaster-like in that it has all the sharp turns and spins, but none of the hills. It also incorporates laser tag. You take a gun from a holster in front of you, and have to shoot aliens as you move through the ride. It even shows you your score as you madly fire away, taking advantage of your unlimited ammunition.

So I don't really remember many details of the ride itself, because I was too focused on the shooting gallery aspect. And I didn't even do that well, placing third overall in a car of six passengers. My boyfriend outpaced me by about 20%, and this woman next to us practically doubled our two scores put together. Embarrassingly, this happened after I joked as the ride began that we two would obviously have to do the lion's share of the work in our car. So, a reminder that looks can be deceiving. And I totally want that little blonde mom watching my back when the aliens invade.

The Simpsons Ride. This a motion simulator ride ostensibly built by Krusty the Clown and sabotaged by Sideshow Bob. And it's more entertaining that the actual Simpsons TV show has been in a decade. To clarify for those who think, "well that's not saying much," it is pretty fun. Not the best motion simulator we rode during the trip, but not the worst either.

By the time we made it through all that (after our morning back at Islands of Adventure), it was time to head out to one of the two shows we'd scheduled during the trip. And that seems like a pretty good point to stop my meandering narrative for the day. I'll be back with more tomorrow (whether you like it or not).