Wow, sounds like you should stop trying to do surgery out of your garage! You've been caught!
Seriously, it's a NICKNAME. None of us "own" our names. If I want to go change my name to Nicole Kidman right now, I can, and the much more well-known actress can do nothing to stop me. These are the internets, sir, and we all pretty much make up a name.
Dude, if this guy is serious he should delete his life and re-roll someone who doesn't have a corn cob up his ass about his over-perceived self importance.
OMG MY NAME MIGHT BE HAXXORZED ON THE INTERWEBS! I R TEH VEXXED AND SHALL PWN!!!11ONE1!!
It's the internet dude, wtf did you think it's for?
I thought this "Dr." Heimlich was kidding at first. I thought maybe it was some 12 year old with nothing else to do. After reading a few of his entries, though, he's obviously not, he's an educated man with nothing else to do.
"Dr." Heimlich, how proud you must be, to have achieved a "doctorate" and then celebrate this by flaming a blog that's about movies, books and life in general. Seems to me that this shows more about your "professional" side than anything DrHeimlich says or does. I am curious though, when did you get this "doctorate" degree?
Congrats on that "doctorate", now how about moving out of your mom's basement and go do something productive with it!
Well dear Evan Heimlich, perhaps since you attended school to be a doctor you're unclear on how "prior art" works in the world of legality.
Since you've freely admitted that you've just recently added the "Dr." to your online presence, it's quite easy to verify (on this blog alone) that it has been in use since at LEAST November 2005.
So regardless of whether or not you find something offensive written here or at the man's work, there is little besides jack and shit you can do about it other than clarify to people that it isn't you. Why? Because he has never insinuated or intended to defraud by impersonating you.
He has created an online persona which is not defamatory, is for legitimate blogging and work purposes, and does not qualify as cybersquatting. If you wish to explore further, you can look toward the legal proceedings of myriad movie stars and companies which set precedent. Since he hasn't registered an domain and is using a screenname on a private company's site, you don't even have the authority to file for action under the Anticybersquatting Consumer Protection Act which took effect on November 29, 1999.
It must be nice to feel the need to come and intrude into a group of people who willing to laugh at a coincidence. We never deigned to come into your world and screw with you.
Take your flamebait trolling back to DIGG or Slashdot and STFU.
OK, after reading more closely, I see that you received this doctorate last month, my bad.
Did you happen to notice that this blog was started in April of 2005? To suggest that he's trying to become "Dr. Evan Heimlich" is ludacris, when it takes about 2 minutes to see that he's not trying to say he's a doctor - nor really assume the name.
Furthermore, let's look at you reply to Kathy, shall we?
I contacted you through your blog because I didn’t see your e-mail address. That’s because smart people are anonymous online…
You can reach me at GDEZTEZJHYUX [then the ‘at’] spammotel [then the dot] com You expect us to believe this is a real address?
but your challenges, rather than make me back off, tend to force my hand. Because that’s what sociology people tend to do – they love to talk (speaking from experience – Did the sociology bit for a while in college, then got tired of fellow classmates spitting rhetoric and bullshit. So I decided to look into a real science)
But if he publishes something I think is too silly or dumb, using this name, then I’ll have to object and to try to clarify the situation, because my business might be at stake. Business of what exactly? Seems like you’re a professor, do you think your students really listen now?
Yet my objection now is to his use of the quotation marks. Given what’s already out there, I’d much prefer if it was simply under the name “Evan Heimlich Lorentz.” Do you understand the point of the quotation marks? It’s meant to tag a nickname or screenname
It would cast aspersions on the perceived legitimacy of the good names of Roland Deschain Um, Roland Deschain is a frakking character from a book. It’s a fictional name, which leads us to my earlier point, smart people don’t use their full real name online.
Use of “Evan ‘Heimlich’ Lorentz”—that is my concern. That’s a pen name stuck within quotes and inserted within his legal (I presume) name. The sum total is hardly, in itself, a nickname. But the quotes indicate that it is a nickname – He doesn’t sign his checks with the “Heimlich”.
…an avatar that bore more than a passing resemblance to Evan Heimlich. So he should have a disclaimer after his online avatar? **This avatar is in no way meant to be nor have any similarity to the real, one and only flametastic Dr Evan Heimlich**
As for whether the internet *should* be an anarchic zone in this respect, that’s debatable, but I’m not interested in taking that bait. Does anyone believe you're "not interested in taking that bait"? Look below, seems like you are quite interested. Besides, she didn’t say it “should” be an anarchic zone, that’s more of your “doctorate” coming out isn’t it? She said most people online make up names – Guess what, mine’s not Sang E. Diver
It’s much more salient, I think, to realize that in order to have any chance of resisting degeneration into abuses of power, anarchy requires the highest degree of interpersonal self-responsibility. Blah, blah, sociological rhetoric, blah.
There’s a lot of concern, in this millennium, over protecting one person’s legal name from misuse by another, especially via the internet. Exactly our point(see above). Most people don’t use their real names online (do I really need to keep repeating this?)
Now if you want to start calling yourself Nicole Kidman I agree that you can do it. But if you use her name in the credits of any movies, or in any way that might hinder her in making her living, then there is plenty she can do to stop you. But she’s not, and DrHeimlich isn’t writing any papers on the government’s influence in movies, he writes about games, and even then he doesn’t claim to be the one and “only” Dr. Evan Heimlich (see discalimer above).
…still in the end you would persist undaunted in using her name in any way you see fit. Because it’s the internet, people write what they like. It’s mostly an anonymous setting, I could be cross dressing hermaphrodite, and you could be a Japanese schoolgirl, but it doesn’t change that we can be anything or say anything online.
This might be, but why should it be so, or even said? Merely because you think you can, or to prove something? Or as if it is a litmus test of liberty? No, it’s a litmus test of the anonymity of having an online presence.
Finally, Kathy, you tell me that “These are the internets, sir, and we all pretty much make up a name.” Well ma’am, I question your data and assumptions. Legions of people use their legal names on the internet. But probably shouldn’t (sigh…once more with feeling. Most people don’t use their real names online).
I question the relevance of the Nicole Kidman example, because her name is in the public domain, and mine is not (yet). You say “(yet)”, hmmm. Could flaming random blogs be a step in getting your name in the public domain?
… and you claimed that you had pretty much made up the name, “Nicole Kidman” by yourself… Drheimlich never said he made up the name by himself. There’s a story to the name. I'll leave it to Drheimlich to tell you that story. Personally I don’t feel that it’s any of your business.
Basically, I'm with Roland. STFU OMFG, leave My BFF Drheimlich alone!
We know how to use Google as well. If indeed you are THE Evan Heimlich, you don't even have a case for there being the ability to confuse the two of you on the basis of similar fields of interests or business (A la Apple Oomputers vs. Apple Records.)
Congratulations. You've written about Jack Kerouac, Welsh Americans, have a B.A. in American Studies, an M.A. in English, and apparently now your Ph.D. from the University of Kansas.
After reading some of your work, you've got one hell of a job of convincing people that anyone will ever confuse you as an SAAP at Kobe University and professor at the University of Kent with an entertainment blogger and computer game designer in Lakewood, Colorado.
As a rule, the group of us have either our B.A. or higher - and have no problem jousting with your tedious arguments. This is the real world where people will respond to you - not a university where everyone will pat your back and say good job just because you've got an alphabet after your name.
Alright dude, why in holy fucking hell would have a problem with the quotation marks? That is the one thing that CLEARLY defines that it's a handle and in no way his real name.
And yes, I post here anonymously because A) I very much enjoy the anonymity, B) can call you a jackass with impunity for your uninformed and weak arguments, and C)wonder if a person like "Evan Heimlich skull-fucks infants" (I have no proof or basis for this mind you, but it's the interwebs and I can wonder what I want).
So now you will post another massive entry here with comments about this and that, but honestly dude, just go away and save yourself embarrassment. Because you know what... we all know your real name now and can do what we want all over the internet wondering if "Evan Heimlich doesn't like his boyfriend to wash before he rams his anus." (Damn, isn't anonymity fun!)
I can hide here with impunity because I'm not an Rtard and posts his name on the internet. It's a warm comfortable feeling (like the one you get inside your boyfriend).
And lastly, you coming here and arguing with us reminds me of a classic saying: Arguing on the internet is like running in the Special Olympics... you may win but you're still retarded.
They must be handing out PHD's for free these days, 'cause you are a grade-A bonehead!
Dude, don't you get it? There is nothing to clear, DrHeimlich will never engage you again, and you can toss off. As he said, he does not owe you any explanation, does not want to chat with you, and does not care about your opinion in any way shape or form. You should feel blessed that he even decided to tell you the origins of his moniker.
Lots of people have the same name. Get over yourself. Until you actively engage all other Evan Heimlich's everywhere then you can just write this up as you being a sad little man that chose to step into a hornet's nest. DrHeimlich's friends will back him up until the end of time, with you only yelling at a wall that will not respond back.
DrHeimlich, I suggest contacting the moderators of this web site and report this dude for harassment.
The ONLY reason that threads have crossed here is because you sir have crossed them. Everyone here was blissfully unaware of you until you came here and made this an issue because you felt that you needed an answer to something.
And stop using my name in your comments. It's "Nicole" to you.
(BTW, I could make as many movies as I want as "Nicole Kidman". I just couldn't make movies that require a SAG card with that name on it, as that is the organization that regulates naming in that industry. And I wouldn't worry about anyone getting you and our friend here mixed up. You two are obviously nothing alike.)
And just what exactly were we SUPPOSED to think you were asking him to do, but stop calling himself by a nickname that came about in a way that has nothing whatever to do with you, especially since you just KEPT POSTING OVER AND OVER? Sometimes googling your own name is a really bad idea, it looks like. I'm never doing it again if it can have this effect on a person.
I know I really should let all this go, but this guy really gets me going (which I know is his main reason for posting here, fishing for arguments and all, but so be it)...
I find that the respondents on your blog seem pretty serious about confrontation. Look, I still consider myself unserious about this. Really? Let's look at your fourth post when you posted, "No I'm not kidding." How should we respond if you're truly "unserious" about this.
But if we’re calling names, what about “Air ‘Quote’ Marshall?” Is his business calling someone “‘Asshat’”? That’s nice work if you can get it. No it's not my business, it's my opinion. That's what the internet and sites like this are all about - opinions. In my opinion you sir, are an asshat, doctorate or no. Also, You seem to need help with using quotation marks in names, this should help, http://www.chicagomanualofstyle.org/CMS_FAQ/ProperNames/ProperNames16.html
Indeed seeing how well you’re doing professionally, maybe I should use Lorentz in my name a few times. Wait, isn't this exactly what you started whining about in the first place?
It’s the use of quotation marks that I find a problem. I certainly have better things to do, but I might pursue the quotation marks. So you are serious about this, make up your mind. For someone with a PhD in English you show a surprising lack of understanding in the use of quotations to emphasize a nickname (for the love of all that's holy, see above link)
Look, why don’t we just talk, say on Skype. This is kind of fun, but how about we clear the air? To reiterate Mr. Anonymous above, there's no air to clear. You're in the wrong. Why in the hell would Drheimlich want to discuss anything with you in a private forum, when he hasn't in a public one? You really think he's going to give you his email address or Skype logon now?
Any-who...How about that Jerry and his emissions? Talk about free publicity. Wait a sec... Maybe this "Evan Heimlich" is Jerry with a diabolical plot to get more exposure. He certainly has the verbal emission thing down...
30 comments:
Must be "Jerr" that's responsible for all the foul smelling. That would explain why the Y is standing a little apart.
FKL
What if you're hard of smelling?
And EH, you're taking his name a bit too seriuosly. You do realize most people don't use their real names online, right?
Really? The only Evan Heimlich in the world? Wow...
ironic that the whole anonymous name thing comes during a posting about naming?
there's a SNL skit where a Dr. Matt Damon finds the actor Matt Damon on a park bench, and yells at him for ruining the name "Matt Damon." funny skit.
and technically he's only going by DrHeimlich so it could be Dr. Bob Heimlich for all you know?
the mole
Where's the camera? I'm being punked.
C'mon, Dr. Heimlich. I'm curious how you're going to get the explanation across to the inquisitive Evan Heimlich. ;-)
Wow, sounds like you should stop trying to do surgery out of your garage! You've been caught!
Seriously, it's a NICKNAME. None of us "own" our names. If I want to go change my name to Nicole Kidman right now, I can, and the much more well-known actress can do nothing to stop me. These are the internets, sir, and we all pretty much make up a name.
Dude, if this guy is serious he should delete his life and re-roll someone who doesn't have a corn cob up his ass about his over-perceived self importance.
OMG MY NAME MIGHT BE HAXXORZED ON THE INTERWEBS! I R TEH VEXXED AND SHALL PWN!!!11ONE1!!
It's the internet dude, wtf did you think it's for?
Wow.
I thought this "Dr." Heimlich was kidding at first. I thought maybe it was some 12 year old with nothing else to do. After reading a few of his entries, though, he's obviously not, he's an educated man with nothing else to do.
"Dr." Heimlich, how proud you must be, to have achieved a "doctorate" and then celebrate this by flaming a blog that's about movies, books and life in general. Seems to me that this shows more about your "professional" side than anything DrHeimlich says or does. I am curious though, when did you get this "doctorate" degree?
Congrats on that "doctorate", now how about moving out of your mom's basement and go do something productive with it!
Sincerely,
Air Marshal Sangediver
Well dear Evan Heimlich, perhaps since you attended school to be a doctor you're unclear on how "prior art" works in the world of legality.
Since you've freely admitted that you've just recently added the "Dr." to your online presence, it's quite easy to verify (on this blog alone) that it has been in use since at LEAST November 2005.
So regardless of whether or not you find something offensive written here or at the man's work, there is little besides jack and shit you can do about it other than clarify to people that it isn't you. Why? Because he has never insinuated or intended to defraud by impersonating you.
He has created an online persona which is not defamatory, is for legitimate blogging and work purposes, and does not qualify as cybersquatting. If you wish to explore further, you can look toward the legal proceedings of myriad movie stars and companies which set precedent. Since he hasn't registered an domain and is using a screenname on a private company's site, you don't even have the authority to file for action under the Anticybersquatting Consumer Protection Act which took effect on November 29, 1999.
It must be nice to feel the need to come and intrude into a group of people who willing to laugh at a coincidence. We never deigned to come into your world and screw with you.
Take your flamebait trolling back to DIGG or Slashdot and STFU.
Sir Roland Deschain
OK, after reading more closely, I see that you received this doctorate last month, my bad.
Did you happen to notice that this blog was started in April of 2005? To suggest that he's trying to become "Dr. Evan Heimlich" is ludacris, when it takes about 2 minutes to see that he's not trying to say he's a doctor - nor really assume the name.
Furthermore, let's look at you reply to Kathy, shall we?
I contacted you through your blog because I didn’t see your e-mail address.
That’s because smart people are anonymous online…
You can reach me at GDEZTEZJHYUX [then the ‘at’] spammotel [then the dot] com
You expect us to believe this is a real address?
but your challenges, rather than make me back off, tend to force my hand.
Because that’s what sociology people tend to do – they love to talk (speaking from experience – Did the sociology bit for a while in college, then got tired of fellow classmates spitting rhetoric and bullshit. So I decided to look into a real science)
But if he publishes something I think is too silly or dumb, using this name, then I’ll have to object and to try to clarify the situation, because my business might be at stake.
Business of what exactly? Seems like you’re a professor, do you think your students really listen now?
Yet my objection now is to his use of the quotation marks. Given what’s already out there, I’d much prefer if it was simply under the name “Evan Heimlich Lorentz.”
Do you understand the point of the quotation marks? It’s meant to tag a nickname or screenname
It would cast aspersions on the perceived legitimacy of the good names of Roland Deschain
Um, Roland Deschain is a frakking character from a book. It’s a fictional name, which leads us to my earlier point, smart people don’t use their full real name online.
Use of “Evan ‘Heimlich’ Lorentz”—that is my concern. That’s a pen name stuck within quotes and inserted within his legal (I presume) name. The sum total is hardly, in itself, a nickname.
But the quotes indicate that it is a nickname – He doesn’t sign his checks with the “Heimlich”.
…an avatar that bore more than a passing resemblance to Evan Heimlich.
So he should have a disclaimer after his online avatar? **This avatar is in no way meant to be nor have any similarity to the real, one and only flametastic Dr Evan Heimlich**
As for whether the internet *should* be an anarchic zone in this respect, that’s debatable, but I’m not interested in taking that bait.
Does anyone believe you're "not interested in taking that bait"? Look below, seems like you are quite interested. Besides, she didn’t say it “should” be an anarchic zone, that’s more of your “doctorate” coming out isn’t it? She said most people online make up names – Guess what, mine’s not Sang E. Diver
It’s much more salient, I think, to realize that in order to have any chance of resisting degeneration into abuses of power, anarchy requires the highest degree of interpersonal self-responsibility.
Blah, blah, sociological rhetoric, blah.
There’s a lot of concern, in this millennium, over protecting one person’s legal name from misuse by another, especially via the internet.
Exactly our point(see above). Most people don’t use their real names online (do I really need to keep repeating this?)
Now if you want to start calling yourself Nicole Kidman I agree that you can do it. But if you use her name in the credits of any movies, or in any way that might hinder her in making her living, then there is plenty she can do to stop you.
But she’s not, and DrHeimlich isn’t writing any papers on the government’s influence in movies, he writes about games, and even then he doesn’t claim to be the one and “only” Dr. Evan Heimlich (see discalimer above).
…still in the end you would persist undaunted in using her name in any way you see fit.
Because it’s the internet, people write what they like. It’s mostly an anonymous setting, I could be cross dressing hermaphrodite, and you could be a Japanese schoolgirl, but it doesn’t change that we can be anything or say anything online.
This might be, but why should it be so, or even said? Merely because you think you can, or to prove something? Or as if it is a litmus test of liberty?
No, it’s a litmus test of the anonymity of having an online presence.
Finally, Kathy, you tell me that “These are the internets, sir, and we all pretty much make up a name.” Well ma’am, I question your data and assumptions. Legions of people use their legal names on the internet.
But probably shouldn’t (sigh…once more with feeling. Most people don’t use their real names online).
I question the relevance of the Nicole Kidman example, because her name is in the public domain, and mine is not (yet).
You say “(yet)”, hmmm. Could flaming random blogs be a step in getting your name in the public domain?
… and you claimed that you had pretty much made up the name, “Nicole Kidman” by yourself…
Drheimlich never said he made up the name by himself. There’s a story to the name. I'll leave it to Drheimlich to tell you that story. Personally I don’t feel that it’s any of your business.
Basically, I'm with Roland. STFU OMFG, leave My BFF Drheimlich alone!
We know how to use Google as well. If indeed you are THE Evan Heimlich, you don't even have a case for there being the ability to confuse the two of you on the basis of similar fields of interests or business (A la Apple Oomputers vs. Apple Records.)
Congratulations. You've written about Jack Kerouac, Welsh Americans, have a B.A. in American Studies, an M.A. in English, and apparently now your Ph.D. from the University of Kansas.
After reading some of your work, you've got one hell of a job of convincing people that anyone will ever confuse you as an SAAP at Kobe University and professor at the University of Kent with an entertainment blogger and computer game designer in Lakewood, Colorado.
As a rule, the group of us have either our B.A. or higher - and have no problem jousting with your tedious arguments. This is the real world where people will respond to you - not a university where everyone will pat your back and say good job just because you've got an alphabet after your name.
/end rant
Alright dude, why in holy fucking hell would have a problem with the quotation marks? That is the one thing that CLEARLY defines that it's a handle and in no way his real name.
And yes, I post here anonymously because A) I very much enjoy the anonymity, B) can call you a jackass with impunity for your uninformed and weak arguments, and C)wonder if a person like "Evan Heimlich skull-fucks infants" (I have no proof or basis for this mind you, but it's the interwebs and I can wonder what I want).
So now you will post another massive entry here with comments about this and that, but honestly dude, just go away and save yourself embarrassment. Because you know what... we all know your real name now and can do what we want all over the internet wondering if "Evan Heimlich doesn't like his boyfriend to wash before he rams his anus." (Damn, isn't anonymity fun!)
I can hide here with impunity because I'm not an Rtard and posts his name on the internet. It's a warm comfortable feeling (like the one you get inside your boyfriend).
And lastly, you coming here and arguing with us reminds me of a classic saying: Arguing on the internet is like running in the Special Olympics... you may win but you're still retarded.
They must be handing out PHD's for free these days, 'cause you are a grade-A bonehead!
STOP POSTING WITH MY NAME ANONYMOUS!!!!!!!
This is the most amazing comment thread ever.
Dude, don't you get it? There is nothing to clear, DrHeimlich will never engage you again, and you can toss off. As he said, he does not owe you any explanation, does not want to chat with you, and does not care about your opinion in any way shape or form. You should feel blessed that he even decided to tell you the origins of his moniker.
Lots of people have the same name. Get over yourself. Until you actively engage all other Evan Heimlich's everywhere then you can just write this up as you being a sad little man that chose to step into a hornet's nest. DrHeimlich's friends will back him up until the end of time, with you only yelling at a wall that will not respond back.
DrHeimlich, I suggest contacting the moderators of this web site and report this dude for harassment.
The ONLY reason that threads have crossed here is because you sir have crossed them. Everyone here was blissfully unaware of you until you came here and made this an issue because you felt that you needed an answer to something.
And now you want to "clear the air". Go to hell.
And stop using my name in your comments. It's "Nicole" to you.
(BTW, I could make as many movies as I want as "Nicole Kidman". I just couldn't make movies that require a SAG card with that name on it, as that is the organization that regulates naming in that industry. And I wouldn't worry about anyone getting you and our friend here mixed up. You two are obviously nothing alike.)
And just what exactly were we SUPPOSED to think you were asking him to do, but stop calling himself by a nickname that came about in a way that has nothing whatever to do with you, especially since you just KEPT POSTING OVER AND OVER? Sometimes googling your own name is a really bad idea, it looks like. I'm never doing it again if it can have this effect on a person.
Goddammit, we're supposed to be talking about the JERRY'S EMISSIONS SIGN!
I hate threadjacking.
RLY?
This is too much.
I know I really should let all this go, but this guy really gets me going (which I know is his main reason for posting here, fishing for arguments and all, but so be it)...
I find that the respondents on your blog seem pretty serious about confrontation. Look, I still consider myself unserious about this.
Really? Let's look at your fourth post when you posted, "No I'm not kidding." How should we respond if you're truly "unserious" about this.
But if we’re calling names, what about “Air ‘Quote’ Marshall?” Is his business calling someone “‘Asshat’”? That’s nice work if you can get it.
No it's not my business, it's my opinion. That's what the internet and sites like this are all about - opinions. In my opinion you sir, are an asshat, doctorate or no. Also, You seem to need help with using quotation marks in names, this should help, http://www.chicagomanualofstyle.org/CMS_FAQ/ProperNames/ProperNames16.html
Indeed seeing how well you’re doing professionally, maybe I should use Lorentz in my name a few times.
Wait, isn't this exactly what you started whining about in the first place?
It’s the use of quotation marks that I find a problem. I certainly have better things to do, but I might pursue the quotation marks.
So you are serious about this, make up your mind. For someone with a PhD in English you show a surprising lack of understanding in the use of quotations to emphasize a nickname (for the love of all that's holy, see above link)
Look, why don’t we just talk, say on Skype. This is kind of fun, but how about we clear the air?
To reiterate Mr. Anonymous above, there's no air to clear. You're in the wrong. Why in the hell would Drheimlich want to discuss anything with you in a private forum, when he hasn't in a public one? You really think he's going to give you his email address or Skype logon now?
Any-who...How about that Jerry and his emissions? Talk about free publicity. Wait a sec... Maybe this "Evan Heimlich" is Jerry with a diabolical plot to get more exposure. He certainly has the verbal emission thing down...
Let's try that link again. Evan Heimlich, please check this out, you obviously need the help from the Chicago Manual of Style
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